Love~Faith~Hope

During these intense 6 months of co-leading a YWAM training school, I have been learning and exploring tons of thing about who God is and about myself which I have to lay down myself in many ways. My intimate relationship with God has been developing since I took the FOCOS (Coaching Course with CMI), for I started to focus more on my quality time with God and learning to listen to him. In past 3 months, although there are so much works going on, I still learn to be still and know that God is God where I can't control any thing at all. Through this school, I wish I could be more prepared, the building would be perfect to run the school, all staffs would be ready to serve the school, and the students would learn and grow incredibly, but those are false expectations because God's plan and how he works in a whole group and individual are totally what we are experiencing now. There are tons of small thing occurs to make us discouraged, but I do learn to let thing go and depend on Go

The 2nd of January is the date that reminds me of mom passing away. In this 2017, it will be 3 years that she has gone from this earth. I always have mixed feeling between glad and grief because of the thing in this world. It would be better for her to be set free from all kind of painful and difficulty in life, but it is also hard for those who are left behind, since she had been the center of our family. During these 3 years, I also can see how God walked us through as the family. Although I am still missing her and grief deeply in my heart, I have hope to look forward to see her again. Since loosing someone became real to me, I am able to look around and understand how others would feel. I was comforted through people who has been through it before, so God is able to use me for his glory to comfort those in their losses. However, I have became stronger in who I am because I considered how important part my step mom was to me, and as death can separate us at any time, I now learn to

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11 ESV There are many people in different generation refer to this specific scripture as their comforts, their hopes, and encouragement for others which is not wrong of doing it so, but recently I read this passage over and over until I have the deeper understanding with its context and meditate on it, so I want to write it down to remind myself and share it with you. The verse before this scripture is "For Thus says the Lord: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will visit you, and I'll fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." - Jeremiah 29:10-11 ESV . God told Jeremiah to write a letter stating this passage in Jerusalem and send it to the survivi

Since I was in Leadership Development Course in Cebu, Philippines, I was thinking many time that I want to put my experience and thoughts in my blog, but somehow I couldn't manage myself to reflect and do it properly. Today I thought it is time for me to finally do it. There were many wonderful thing happen to me personally throughout the course, and the main part of it involved with my marriage life as well. God removed my doubts about my childhood which became an significant change in my life, and as I knew God is working in me through listening to his voice this year particularly. The challenge for me is about how I would stand firm and put it in a practical way to my life even it is after the course. I graduated from this course a month already, and I evaluated myself about it. I didn't really do good as I had expected myself when I was in the course. One thing though I learned from my marriage life, the challenge is how my husband and I will become a good marriage couple,

In this world setting, being leader means you have worked your way up with all kind of hard works and receive approval from above authority where you have to watch out on your performance and any sign of failure. I once thought it would be the same in the mission world where we need approve from our leaders that we can be promoting to higher position. As I am taking the Leadership Development Course, I was taught with many information about being leader, learning your DISC personality type and discovering your spiritual gift. It didn't click until one morning I woke up and spent my time preparing myself to go through Timeline-Workshop in this Course. Earlier of that week, I was prompted by the Scriptures from Psalm 144:1-2 "Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hand for war, and my fingers for battle; he is my steadfast love and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield and he in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me."The word 'trains'

Around this time last year, I was at the Father Heart 'A' school, and it was only a week to learn about God's heart as a father. I expected me to be changed and healed from all the wounded of my past, so that I don't have any trouble to love and accept others, but what I experienced there was completely contrast from my expectation. I experienced God's heart for me and learned how much he loves me. I found a huge fear in the core of me, the fear of death, and there is no one will fight to protect me because I was ruined since I was in the womb of my mom, but God revealed himself to me that he was there to protect and comfort me. I can prove that he is right because I am still alive until today. I am so afraid to be in some place that I can't help myself if there is an emergency, I am afraid to fly, I am afraid to be in the ocean and surround with water. This is what God revealed to me, and it helped me to deal with it. I need to understand who God is for me, so