Hello to the year 2020!! We are in the beginning of this new year with a huge change in my life and my family, for I am about 6 months pregnant. Hence we are expecting a son by the end of March or the beginning of April, so there are about 3 more months of this journey.
Although we weren't plan on having a child, we knew deep in our hearts that God has placed this boy in our lives in a right timing, and this huge transition is going to move us in faith even further than what we could have thought of. Throughout these 6 months of being pregnant, I got to learn and experienced many thing that allows me to become more a mother-liked person. It began with what I recalled how my step mom miscarried her baby many time because she was working very hard, didn't get enough rest, and wasn't aware of what routine the pregnant woman shouldn't have done. I was young by that time, but I saw how my step mom suffer too much from grieving and kept pressing on having her own baby. As a mom now, I felt sorry for her that there was no one who could tell her how to look after herself and put her pregnancy as her priority. This makes me thankful for having a good community that I can seek help and ask for advices in different thing regarding of this matter. Nowadays, there are apps and technologies help the mom to be to prepare and take care of themselves in much better way as well, so I am grateful that we are living in a good timing.
During the time of having morning sickness, I confessed that I didn't handle it well. My morning sickness wasn't that worst comparing to some people, but I struggled really bad because I didn't know how to manage it and not letting it impact my responsibilities. I felt like a failure from time to time, for I was running the school while I was having all of these challenges. My energy was low, I couldn't fully engage with school, and my ability to complete all the task is gone kept bothering me and made me aware what I have put my worth on. My pride of being a working woman is gone, and I felt unsatisfied with the result. When I brought all of this to God, I had to admit that my role is already changed. I am a mom, thus I must fulfil this role first, and I am God's child no matter I complete the task or not. Thank to God that baby is healthy along with my body, and there is nothing to worry about regarding my pregnancy.
My next phase will be preparing myself for giving birth. This is an unknown territory for me, and I don't know how much my body will handle it. I feel afraid and worry about the pain and the difficulties during the labor and giving birth. With these concerns, I am still seeking God about it to comfort me and helping me to hold on His words. Therd will be on my side, so both of us will go through this together, and I expect the joy comes when we get to see our son's face. Please stand with us and pray for us that we can go through it with peace and joy.
Comments